About Poop Sandwich

My name is Lydia and I critique movies before I see them and I'm good at it. By that I mean I'm quite accurate at knowing how good or bad a film will be before it comes out. I'm sort of a movie psychic. But since quality of filmmaking is not all there is to a successful movie, I also rate films by their entertainment value. I use a 10 star system. A perfect film will get 5 stars for quality and 5 for entertainment value. My reviews are based mostly on the trailers for the films, movie posters, and occasionally interviews with actors and directors or even other people's critiques. I never let other people sway my opinion, however. My opinions are far too many and too strong for that.

When rating a film I also like to consider those of you out there who don't know anything about what "quality filmmaking" is, but rather like to follow your heart or wiener, so I have seals that films can earn to help give you a short cut to knowing if a film is for you.

Here are a few:

Masturbation Seal: A film where someone creates any type of art for their own enjoyment without regard for whether or not what they are doing is right for the project itself.

Frat Boy Seal: A film that is generally brainless but with lots of explosions, babes, robots, guns, sex, explosions, or boobs. (Think "Transformers".)

I Want To See It Anyway Seal: When I know a movie won't be all that great, but I still want to see it. (Think "The Chipmunks".)

More seals will be added as I come across movies deserving of them.

Also, from time to time, I will actually see a movie and then I will update my critique of it and let you know if I was right. If I was wrong, I promise I will admit it. I have been wrong before...it's just rare.

Sometimes I will also mention Benny. He is my partner and also a genius film critic. You can trust Benny's opinion.

I hope you enjoy my blog.

Watch out for the poop.